Sunday, 21 August 2011

Before I forget, the little things

Playing the Gin Game (every time I made her a new G&T during the course of the evening, I'd make it stronger & stronger, waiting for the moment when she'd say "oo, it's a touch strong...never happened..)


Watching Shawn the Sheep (with a big smile on face), then promptly switching the channel over to watch Midsummer Murders/CSI/anything with a 'decent' body count.


"Going like the hairy clappers!"


Downing wine like water & insisting on driving home - racing over all 50 million of the speed bumps, because "if you go fast enough you don't even notice them!"


Everything being called a "wee beastie". 


Calling me a "poor fish face" if I was winging about something or other. 


Liking KitKat Chunky's. 


Every inaminate object with a face was always a boy, with an amazing name (such as Wilf, the owl). 


Laying out cereal, bowls, mugs, tea, coffee, plates for toast, butter, jam, marmalade, and anything else hanging around in the mornings if there was ever anyone staying over. 


Getting in from the hair dressers at 11am, pouring a large glass of white wine while saying "it's been such a long morning...would you like one? Get a glass, you know where they are".


Anyone stepping in the door, regardless of the time of day, being offered "Wine? Beer? Gin? I've got some juice? Or some nice whiskey? How about a coffee? Tea? There are some nice biscuits in the cupboard!"


Teaming Chanel no. 5 with bright pink lipstick & powder if going out & about after 5pm (even if it was just to the cinema).


Asking me what "Your Generation" thinks of a whole range of topics & issues.


Being so open minded & forward thinking about so many issues, when so many of your friends are so old fashioned & stuck in the past.


Calling the people of Sitges in Spain "just lovely" because they're all "as gay as you like" and therefore "as safe as houses!". 


Flicking through cruise brochures, not being able to find a cruise you wanted to go on, because you'd already been everywhere. 


Getting a bit more pissed than usual & gossiping about family history. 


Seeming to know all bus routes in SW london, & the quickest possible tube journey to anywhere & everywhere off the top of your head. 


Apologising for taking your shoes off at 10pm, even if it I was hanging out in my pj's. 


Calling your (bright pink) mobile "that wretched thing", & trying repeatedly to learn how to text. 


Insisting that the doorbell was broken, not that your hearing was getting worse! 


Fighting with the rose bushes. 


Making "mashed potato" using the magimix. 


Standing outside your door & waving & waving whenever we drove away until we turned a corner & couldn't see you any more. 


Complaining that your 3 floor, 3 bed house was "simply tiny". 


Coming out with the most amazing phrases & sayings. 


Calling everyone "blessing". 


Lending us hats for the Royal Wedding. 


Keeping copies of the paper from the Queen Mother's jubilee (in 1998). 


"Why are all my friends so dreary?"


"It's wet as fishes outside!"


"oh you poor woppit, do you want some drugs?" (I assume she means means medicine, but who knows!)


"I think he's a good Pope...Ignore the pedophiles...He doesn't kiss the carpets like the last one....And he plays piano well."...


(Referring to me & my cousins) "what with all of you growing & getting new faces, it's very difficult to keep up with my photo frames."


Trying to feed the hedgehog I found in the garden cherry pips. 


Told the Grandmother about Seasick Steve & she said "aw, what a woppet. Sounds like a lovely man"


(Watching TV, quite quiet for once, and then Gary Lineker came on...) "I used to think he was a nice man. But then I found out he cheated on his wife. Don't like him any more".


"See the South African team? They all look like females. Ridiculous."


Referring to Lawrence Fox as "that gorgeous man"!


"You'd make someone a good wife, you're so tidy!"...think she's getting me confused with someone else...


Going to the races. Watching the races. Declining any social events when a big race was on. Enjoying my horse-joke (how'd you make a horse hungry in four letters? ....... M T G G!)


"No, I don't think a man would do that...slitting the throat is much more of a lady-like thing to do"


"You know, I think I'm getting old..."



Watching every race going (the more accidents, the better).


Taking me to the races!






To be updated, as & when. 

Missing you more than I'd have expected, already <3 x x x x




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